"Well then I guess it's a good thing my 1911 holds 7+1."Īnd that is why Harry Potter should have carried a 1911. I can see it now.Voldemort roaring with evil laughter and boasting to Harry that he can't be killed, since he is protected by seven Horcruxes, only to have Harry give a crooked grin, flick his cigarette butt away, and deliver what would easily be the best one-liner in the entire series: Better hope you have some Essence of Dittany for that sucking chest wound. Let's see Voldy wave his at 3,000 feet per second. Voldemort's wand may be 13.5 inches with a Phoenix-feather core, but Harry's would be 0.50 inches with a tungsten core. Theyd escape and survive in hiding, but theyd never manage to overcome the muggles. A group of soldiers with machine guns would just destroy a group of wizards casting killing curses. I don't think Madam Pomfrey has any spells that can scrape your brains off of the trees and put you back together after something like that. Not to mention that most modern technology crushes most of the magic in the movies. 50bmg Barrett, turning Deatheaters into pink mist, scratching a lightning bolt into his rifle stock for each kill. Imagine Harry out in the woods, wearing his invisibility cloak, carrying a. But which is faster: saying a spell or pulling a trigger?Īvada Kedavra, meet Avtomat Kalashnikova. Now I know what you're going to say: "But a wizard could just disarm someone with a gun!" Yeah, well they can also disarm someone with a wand (as they do many times throughout the books/movies). God made wizards and God made muggles, but Samuel Colt made them equal. Remember: gun-control means that Voldemort wins. Meanwhile, Brits have been cutting their steaks with spoons. Imagine how epic the first movie would be if Harry had put a breeching charge on the bathroom wall, flash-banged the hole, and then went in wearing NVGs and a Kevlar-weave stab-vest, carrying a SPAS-12.Īnd have you noticed that only Europe seems to a problem with Deatheaters? Maybe it's because Americans have spent the last 200 years shooting deer, playing GTA: Vice City, and keeping an eye out for black helicopters over their compounds. You aren't looking at it-you're looking at a picture of it. The image is light-amplified and re-transmitted to your eyes. Worried about its Medusa-gaze? Wear night vision goggles. Ok, this has been driving me crazy for seven movies now, and I know you're going to roll your eyes, but hear me out: Harry Potter should have carried a 1911.
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